I am ready for Christmas! I feel like I am a small child counting the days until we head to see my family. In all honesty, it is cold here, which makes going out with Parker a chore. We have completed most of our holiday fun around town (I will not bake anymore, and although I could always shop we are back on the saving plan..more on that in 2011). One day of work and we are out!
Today, I helped out a MOPS mom by watching her 2.5 year old son for a few hours. I think this was a positive for Parker, he shared toys and seemed to attempted new words when he did. His mother happens to be Korean, so I asked her if she would translate the soccer ball below.
This had three messages on it and was given by the foster family. We did not notice writing on family day (what did we notice besides everyone crying and a very unhappy baby...) Well, they say some thing to the tune of "We all love you Sang-tae"...so sweet. To all of the families who wait, rest assured your children are in amazing hands. I am well aware this does not make the wait any easier... I will forever be grateful to his wonderful foster family.
New topic that has plagued me since last night....
I have mentioned a few time, my love for MTV shows. Yes, I will be watching the Real World in the assisted living. Regardless, there was a story last evening about a high school senior who made an adoption plan. They have shown this type of story a few times, but in this case the birth mother went through with the plan, then attempted to parent, and finally went through with the plan. It was amazing to watch the first 48 hours, from her emotions to the objective stance her mother took. Of course I cried when the baby finally went to the adoptive family, the mother stated something along the lines of..I knew it would hurt but I was not ready to go through the grieving process the first time...
Jim and I were talking about how the grieving process in adoption (for birth parents and child) never ends it, as new developmental stages are reached it must be readdressed. Who knows if I will ever get the answers I search for. I would love to know what that day was like for her, Parker's birth mom. More importantly, I pray that she is at peace.
Wow, I deviated throughout this post but MTV can be thought provoking!
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3 comments:
Awesome soccer ball! How cool!
Yes, there is so much loss in adoption. We pray for our children's birth families every day. It's hard to not project my feelings onto the birthmom. But I often wonder how she's doing and if we'll ever meet our children's birthmom's. I cry that she can't see how precious her child is. I wonder what my childrens' first moments of life were like. Did she hold her child or was it too painful that she couldn't. And on and on.
We put such high expectations on these children. How many adults understand and yet these kids are "supposed" to understand it. It does cycle but it isn't a constant thing.
JaM...excellent point...that we must not project our feelings onto this birthmother. I think this is one of the worst things one can do for their children. I will never know her thoughts until we meet.
Love it! And yes, the whole projection thing, it's all so complicated and hard!!!
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