First meeting

We are back from Holt and I am trying to process what I just experienced. I was aware that this would not be an easy transition but I do not think there was anyway to truly prepare. We arrived at Holt and the Social Worker, DJ, took us in to meet the foster mother and Parker. He had just woken up from a nap and she handed him to Jim. He started looking back at her and burst into tears. He would not let Jim or I hold him and would begin to cry and reach for foster mother. We are very happy that he IS attached to the foster family. She said we are the first Caucasian people he has ever seen, in addition we sound, smell, and look very different from anything he has experienced.

DJ translated as we asked the foster mother questions. She told us that he loves to watch Thomas the Train (in Korean, of course), his favorite food is applesauce, he likes rice and seaweed, and bananas. She said he is very smart and likes to imitate everything the foster siblings do. She had to put baby locks on the cabinets, as he know how to get into them. He enjoys baths and trips outside in the stroller, and allows his teeth to be brushed (he has 8 teeth).

Not happy, but loves to smile for the camera. He would look and smile anytime someone brought out a camera or phone. Foster mother had dressed him in one of the outfits we sent and told us she showed him our pictures everyday.

Looking happy as he left with foster mom

We will go back to Holt on Wednesday for his pre-flight physical and hopefully he will recognize us, or not be as scared. Jim and I just said that even though we knew this would be tough we had no idea it would be this emotional. We are anxious for Thursday but worried about what he may go through. I know this will pass and one day we will tell him this story.

Sunday in Seoul

As planned, we took the subway to Myeong-dong to attend the Cathedral. We were excited to explore the church, as there was numerous chapels, a crypt, and is the oldest/largest Cathedral in Seoul. We took a few wrong turns, followed a few steeples, ended up at some other christian Church, but finally found the ornate steeple of Myeong-dong. Others were walking in late so we joined in, there was standing room only. The church was so large there were over 6 plasma screens so you could see the priest. The mass was very quick, and there were lines of people waiting for the next mass to we were unable to walk around and take pictures. It was beautiful and a wonderful opportunity to attend mass in Korean. I think I saw one caucasian person in the entire church.

A grotto for Mary Myeong-dong Cathedral

The quest for the USB cable took us to Lotte Department store, which was 12 stories, and packed with luxury goods. There was an impressive children's floor, that included an adorable Burberry selection, sorry Parker, not at this size :)

We compared some prices with the US, and most things seemed much higher (ie. Bugaboo Bee over $900!) The department store was packed with employees and merchandise. We saw many children, and they seem to stare at us, but will wave too. There was one little boy that pointed at Jim and tried to touch him a few times.

We headed over to Namdaemun market, which is a traditional Korean market. There were many types of food vendors, fish, and lots of clothing. Most of the clothes were impostor Burberry, Ralph Lauren, and every impostor bag you can imagine. Since it was Sunday all of the banks were closed, and we were unable to exchange our travelers checks, so we plan to head back.

We took the subway over to Itaewon, which is a shopping district adjacent to the US Army base. We saw a few more Americans. There were many more western restaurants and shops. Our guide said the area draws many people in their 20's and soldiers for night life. Jim feels he has mastered the subway system, it is in english and very easy to navigate.

We may visit Insadong again tonight for dinner and more shopping. Tomorrow, Monday morning, we head to Holt to meet Parker, it seems surreal. Cannot wait to update with photos.

Kitchen in our room

Seeing Seoul

UPDATE: 20,000 won later and we have a USB cable, below are some photos from yesterday.

We were told to visit the "street with the stream" I did not find it much different than the canal in Indianapolis

There are still a few Christmas decorations up, and people thought we were slow getting our tree down.

Jim and Kwon at Seoul town, couples place locks on the fence to show their love. Many people throw the keys below to symbolize forever. There is a sign that says no throwing keys.

View of Seoul from the tower

Seoul tower

Traditional Korean lunch with our guides

Korean folk museum, in front of the traditional funeral casket

With a palace guard

Hyangwonjeong

Gyeonghoeru pavilion, housed many King banquets

Main throne hall of the palace

Last night I got in bed around 7:00pm, I could not keep my eyes open. I felt like I was sleep walking. Jim decided he was going to explore and headed to bed around 9:00pm. Allegedly, I woke up when he got in bed and asked "Where am I?" I have NEVER been disoriented to place! We both woke up at midnight, took some melatonin and slept until 4:30am. I finally gave up on sleeping at 5:30am and went to the gym to run.

We met our Holt guide at 9:30am in the lobby of our hotel. There were actually two guides, as one was being trained. They were both students, and one actually was on break from UCLA. It was a great day for the tour, as it was almost 50 degrees! It felt like a heat wave! We walked to Gyeongbokgung Palace, it is across the street from our hotel. We then visited the National Korean Folk museum (which was similar to Connor Prairie but with Korean heritage, the guides said it is "boring" for them).

We headed to Insadong, which is a street market filled with restaurants and shops. We ate lunch with our guides and had traditional Korean food. They mentioned that traditional food is not eaten by their generation very often. When asked what they ate, the one said pizza hut and the other said Korean barbecue. We asked to sit on the floor, even though our guides thought we looked uncomfortable. They were impressed with all we knew about Korean food, Seoul, and the culture. The area was very busy but our guides told us that the people were either Chinese or Thai tourists. I kept asking for directions and they would wonder how I knew about those places! We talked about the Korean's view of adoption and about giving Parker the option to know his Korean culture. Next stop was Seoul tower (it would be nice to show my pictures, it was amazing).

Jim and I headed back to Insadong to shop, we are planning on buying Parker 18 years of presents for his forever family day. We managed to purchase two...however I got a beautiful celadon tea set and vase. Mom: Still looking for a vase that would fit the types of flowers you put out. Jim got sick of me pulling him into every pottery shop. Dinner was at a Chinese restaurant, we could not read the menu and no one spoke English. However, what we got tasted much like the Chinese food at home, despite the kimchee that was brought before the meal.

Tomorrow morning we are going to attend mass, in Korean, at Myeong-dong Cathedral. Find an electronic store to buy a USB port for the camera, and visit South Gate Market. Ready to head to bed around 9:00pm!

We have arrived

Jim and I landed in Seoul after a 13.5 hour flight, Korean Airlines was wonderful! The service and the amenities made the long flight bearable.

A Holt guide will be here at 9:30am to take us on a city tour. It is only 7:00pm here but we are going to attempt to get some sleep.

I am too exhausted to be introspective at the moment, but will add those reflections later.

Just thinking

One more day of work, which made me realize, our lives are about to change forever. No, I am not dwelling on the fact that we will be responsible for someone else's life and that our priorities are going to change. We were well aware of those facts when we submitted our application to our agency, we made a decision to not start this journey until we felt ready.

What I mean is that we are never going to blend in again, people are always going to be aware of our decision to adopt, people may judge or question us, feel pity for us, and some may never understand. Jim and I have made a personal decision, one that is the best for for us. That being said, I could not be more excited and am always happy to share our journey with others.

Let's Celebrate!

The flights are confirmed, packing has begun, the dogs have a sitter (thanks Kara), and we are ready to hop on the plane! I am so excited that my parents, maybe Steve, and Jim's parents will be waiting at O'Hare when we get off the plane! We celebrated our call with a bottle of Veuve Cliquot that I had bought for the occasion.

We had a productive day, I cleaned out the entire office and created a filing system (finally). We had papers that were laying around that did not need to be taking up space. I wanted to make sure we had a good medical file for Parker, apparently Holt will give us documents too, and have things in order for his post placement. We still have a finalization process that will take about 6 months to finalize his adoption, which involves more government paperwork. Jim had the plumbing completed in the basement, and I had someone clean the house, it looks fabulous.

I have four more days of work and Jim had three!

He is so Handsome

Thanks to the travel agent our tickets have been booked! We will leave Thursday morning, and spend until Friday in Seoul. Based on previous families journeys, we should meet Parker on Monday and he will be ours forever on Thursday!

We were lucky to receive some new pictures today, not sure when they were taken but he looks like he just came in from the cold. Disclaimer: he will not wear the purple sweatsuit at home!

Comments Welcome!

A few weeks ago someone mentioned they were unable to comment on our blog. Tech savvy Jim has fixed this feature! So please make comments, as this blog will be saved for Parker to read about his journey home.

This will also let us know family and friends are able too see our first moments in Korea!

TRAVEL CALL

Jim got the travel call today, only fair since I received the referral call!

Tentatively we will leave next Thursday or Friday! and arrive ready to meet our Parker in Seoul in a day or two.

Making the list last night was a good idea, we have lots to do in a short amount of time.

The anxiety level has dropped, greatly :)

Things to Accomplish

I started to think of what will need to happen after we get the call. Since we are still waiting on the VI to be scheduled, I have tried to determine how long it has taken other families. Tonight I noticed there is a family who has been waiting a month and a half since their P3 was sent....ahhh.

I do have plenty of things to keep me busy so thought I would compile a list to do after the TC. It makes me feel productive.

Schedule Pediatrician Appointment
Clean house/Carpets
Confirm Dog sitter
PACK
FMLA Forms for work
Contact travel agent
Wash Parker's new bedding and make bed
In the meantime as I wait-

MUST complete CEU's for my clinical license, these are due at the end of March and I do not want to being reading journals when Parker is home.

Take clothes to dry cleaner

See a movie and go to dinner, it may be a long time before we are able to do this!

Jim continues to work on the basement, nothing that involves me :)

Organize the office (files) and the pantry, they are a mess!

Weekend is over...

Weekend ending means the chance for travel call but also means going back to work, which I did today. My new years resolution (in addition to the whole work out, eat less processed foods...those are an every year occurrence) was to realize what is truly important. After the earthquake in Haiti it made me realize that it does not matter if we get our call this week or next week. We are so privileged to adopt from South Korea, the program is not open to everyone and there are a limited number of referrals each year. What ultimately matters is that we have a son, and he is going to join our family. I have thought about all of the orphan this week that will never go back to their families, and it makes me feel selfish for complaining about people asking me about timelines and dates.

In addition, last nights sermon was in relation to Mary and how she is there assist we just need to ask. On the way to church I was expressing my guilt to Jim in returning to work and the overall role change to becoming a mother. I asked him how many times he was questioned about his intent to return to work, hmmm none? I think he is starting to understand that the roles society places us in are very different. I think all of this means that I am feeling immensely guilty, for what I have and for that I still want.

No News + Day Off = Shopping and Room Pictures!

I admit to calling DC the past two days, however it was Jim who called today. He had nothing to report. There were many things I should have done on my day off but I needed to get baby gift for Jim's cousin and ended up shopping. Baby Gap had 50% off of the clearance, wow! Parker got a winter coat for next year for $8.00 (Jim said now he has two, no more! Not a word...but he has three for next year).

I distracted myself by getting Jim some jeans and then got a dress to take to Seoul. I justified it by thinking that I would have the pictures of our first meeting all over the house! and bought a dress for his Tol or his Baptism, depends on the weather. So I did not run, clean the house, or take down the white tree. I will do those things tomorrow. We are meeting some friends to watch the Colts game, apparently it is a big deal.

Below are pictures of Parker's room, there are a few things left to do. Some items to hang on the walls and I am debating about a monogram over his crib.

No Predictions.....

There is really no when to predict when Parker's VI will be scheduled. it could be one week, or nine...I promise I will let all know the second he is ready for travel.

The past few days have followed the same format...I say to Jim "I'm not calling DC today, I just do not want to live my life based on what the Visa Center has to report". I get to work and think, well I have half an hour before my next client, it wouldn't hurt to call. I sit on hold with my heart pounding, thinking what am I going to do if they say VI has been scheduled. As Jim says, I am an anxiety junkie and always need something to obsess about. Well guess what I have plenty!

I had a Junior League meeting tonight and I have not seen some of the women since October, so many of them assumed he is home. It does seem like it has been a long time for those who do not know the typical timeline. Tonight a league member gave me a referral for a pediatric surgeon, that did her daughter's ear surgery. It seems her daughter had a similar issue to Parker and it was great to hear her praises for the doctor!

New Photos

What a good way to end the day, new photos of Parker. He looks so happy, and he is sitting in the chair, on his own..like a grown up! I used to think, why would people with a referral complain at the end of their wait, they are so near travel. I take it back, I should have been more empathetic! That was when we were waiting for a referral...which may I add is much easier. The difficulty is we could get a call in 1 week or 8 weeks, and there is no logical way to predict the timeline.

He will really require a haircut!

No News

Don't let him fool you..he is trouble!!

Dodge and Meg went for a bath and nail trim, he managed to find a bowl of treats, on the counter, and eat a handful as we arrived. I think he was terrible, he is going to be banned from every groomer in Fishers...they all ask..is this his first groom, uh no he's 6 years old!

There are no Parker updates to report. Jim called the national visa hotline this Monday and the paperwork had not arrived. I may call this evening, but do not want to hear it has not arrived, then I will just worry about it until Monday! This whole hotline being available 24/7 is trouble for adoptive parents.


Jim is on his way home from work and we plan to shop for some gifts for the foster family and the staff at Holt Korea (the Korean agency that facilitates the adoption with our US agency). It is customary to exchange gifts in Korea. We were told they do not need to be extravagant but more of gesture. I plan to get Parker's foster mother a birthstone (aquamarine) so she will be reminded of him when she wears it. Jim is being dragged along he is not a fan of shopping, where browsing and decisions are involved. I asked if we could pop into Nordstroms for Parker and he said ok..now I just need to sneak over to the handbags :)

Shower!!!

Pictures from the shower thrown by my dear friends. Julie hosted at her beautiful new home.

Back to work tomorrow for an unknown amount of time. I struggle with living in the present, so this must be a lesson.

I am ready for this work week, it is going to be BUSY!

Happy New Year!

Last night was a wonderful start to 2010! We went to a party hosted by a few guys that Jim works with, and I happen to know from college. We dressed up and toasted the New Year, and had a great time. Every time I listened, Jim was telling someone else about Parker!

We started the day off by meeting some friends for breakfast at Patachou....and for those of you who live in the area...you know about the breakfast-amazing! Jim and I finished Parker's room after a trip to Babies R Us to buy a chair for his room. We also confirmed that the store has the worst customer service, no plans to return. But Parker's room is complete and I will post a picture soon. Our friend Bill is hosting us this evening and tomorrow is another shower, thrown by my dear friends Kara and Julie! Cannot wait!

I think it is safe to say that Jim and I are beginning the biggest adventure of our life this year...

Jim and I New Years Eve

Jen, Me and Kara..taken my me

Cheers, Midnight!

Justin at Midnight

The start of a great year!